[this is an intelligent ramble.]

It seems to be the more I avoid things I disagree with, the more affected and hurt by them I am.
I begin my explanation like this.

I disagree with drinking. I don't like drinking alcohol, I don't see the point in it, and I have no interest in it what so ever. I don't like being drunk, and I'd rather not put myself in a vunerable position where I may not have any idea what I'm doing, and probably won't remember it.
I'm already sick all the time with my tablets, I do not need to drink foul liquid to make myself vomit.

I disagree with smoking. Fine, do it, But it's a waste of money, basically kills you, doesn't look cool and when I smell it I can't breathe. Even if you agree it's so easy to get addicted to nicotine. It's hard to get off, expensive and is a main cause for illness in the UK.

I disagree with drugs. What is the point? Yes, daring. Woop. But isn't drinking so much alcohol you don't know what you're doing and what you're saying daring too? Is risking you like to "have fun", that you won't remember the next day, really a good idea? It's illegal, and the dealers may not be giving you the pure drug. Can you not have a good time without this "aid"? Why use something that could instantly kill you? In most occasions, the whole group of friends are taking drugs and drinking, etc. So if something did happen to you - are they really in the right mind set to be saving your life? I wouldn't put my life in the hands of a drunk and drugged person.

I don't go to parties. Well, I don't really get invited to them. I like having a good time and dancing and seeing my friends. But these days, that's not all there is to a party. Violence, sex, drugs and out of order behavior is included. As someone who would be staying sober the whole party, my idea of enjoyment is not feeling thretend or intimidated by people. Even those I may know. My sensible hat kicks in, and I won't enjoy myself because I'll be to worried about someone fainting or getting hurt.

Lets conclude so far.
I don't drink. I don't smoke. I don't do drugs. I don't go to all-nighters. I don't enjoy being in places that put me into situations with violence and feeling unsecure.

- I don't agree with stealing, or shop lifiting, etc, on any level. OBV.
- I've got through most of my own depression and issues.
- I've decided what I think is sensible and acceptable (yet reasonable) for people to be doing sexually at my age.
- I've never lied about the place I was going to, sneaked out, or been not about to contact someone when it's an emmergency.
-I've got over my body issues and moved on.

I've been sensible and concidered my future.
I'm not a hypocrite, the things I've said I won't do.
I do believe these things. And a lot of them strongly.
I don't nesassairly look down on people who do the things I disagree with, but I do wonder why they they do it and think it's clever/fun/exciting/grown up.

AND YET. EVEN THOUGH I'VE MADE ALL THESE DECISSIONS AND TRIED TO AVOID THEES THINGS. I'VE BEEN HIT AND HURT DEEPLY BY EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THESE ISSUES.
How can it be that even when I make the best choices and think intelligently about my life to avoid the pain and damage these things cause, that I STILL get all the hurt?
This isn't fair.

If I make the smart decission not to do drink/smoke/drugs because I'm worried about damaging my body and my future - that's I'm not being rewarded for making this decission?
When people find out they don't go "that's great! I wish I was as strong as you!" they go "Well I do it and I'm alright, and it is safe and its fun etc etc"
And when these young girls go out at night and get drunk and out of their mind, I'm sat at home worrying about if they're okay and being hurt by it.
A girl stayed over at my house just the other week. She was throwing up everywhere, feeling dizzy, she didn't know what she was doing, where she was and who she was with. If my brother hadn't brought her back to ours, I can' help but wonder what would have happened to her.

I've got over my depression and moved on. And just as I do I become close friends with a girl online. I really like this girl, we have a lot on common. And I had a bit of a crush on her.
I just found out she's depressed so she doesn't eat, she drinks, she smokes and she does drugs. She then describes how much she's misses her drugs when she can't get them and how sometimes she drinks through bottles and bottles.
This is unfair, as I just got over my depression and stopped worry about it, and now I'm sad and gotten down because someone who means a lot to me is going through the same thing. Sure, I'm helping her. But every day I'm worrying and the hurt is draining me.

I have so many examples of these issues.
Tonight my brothers friend is staying over because he won't go home to his parents because they don't agree with his drug taking.
I want to make friends, find love, etc, but I don't want to be hurt by someone doing these things. Do you know how hard it is to find a teenager who doesn't want to have sex, get drunk every night, sneak out of her house and lie their her parents?
I'm not telling anyone what to do with their life, and I do have great friends who do these things.
But as I started this with.
Why is it that maybe I am even MORE affected by these things, even though I don't do them? Because I don't agree with them? I don't know. It's like these issues follow me around because I want to spare my life from them.